My Daughter Left Me For Minnie Mouse

Well, spring break has officially arrived and I am at home. Yes, the absolute FIRST spring break I have not jetted/drove off somewhere for the week. There's a weird calming peace to it, though, I must say. Literally for as long as I can remember, mom and dad packed us all up [usually with a friend] and we'd drive down to Orlando for the week. I never did the Panama City, Fl spring break or any of that - didn't care to. Although, there was that one time I lived there and did experience it for the first time. Regrettably, I enjoyed it for that brief moment. But as luck would have it, I moved away and never did it again. #winning! Disneyworld/Universal was where it was at for me. Hands down. Although now I prefer more of a Hilton Head relaxed vacation, given Disneyworld can get exhausting with two kids [admit it parents!]. But with that said, I still wouldn't trade those memories for anything; nothing is more important than seeing that life in their eyes. 

Ok now I'm getting sad. 

So..... my daughter left for spring break this morning and I've been a basket case. No this isn't like a senior year trip to Cancun [yikes, my heart can't even fathom that right at this moment] ... no she's only 4. When we found out we were expecting and set to deliver after the first of the year, my parents jumped right on that and decided to take her to Disney as a nice "big sister" trip but just the three of them - to give us a short week to ourselves with little man. All fine and dandy at the time of planning said trip, but now it's here. And I'm sad. I miss her. Like reeeaaaallllly miss her. My heart was aching last night when we said goodbye. Even when Chris went to give her a hug she said "...are you leaving me?" Oh my heart!!! :( I know she's in good hands, that's not the issue. I have serious separation anxiety and sometimes it just gets the best of me. 

So here I am. Little man is asleep, hubs is being the handy man helping his dad at their house, so it's just me. It gets too quiet, so I usually put on Big Band/Swing [ch.801 Direct tv, if you're interested] and let it play. It's soothing. I don't dare turn on a movie, afraid it'll trigger something that will remind me of my girl. Yes, I am that sensitive. I cried like a baby last night.

I think it's just the whole I'm at home, while she's away thing. When I leave for a trip without the kids it still takes me a day to recover, but I know I'll be ok because I'm not home where their toys are everywhere or near the smell of their clothes/room. But I'm home! So everything reminds me of her. I opened her door this morning just to peek in and the smell of her little room just got to me. I sound like such a sap. 

7 more days, and she'll be back home. But who's counting? :) 

Home Is Where The Heart Is

Well we have managed to survive our first week at home! If you read the end of my last post, you'd understand what I mean by survive. 

This past week has reiterated the importance of managing time, but most importantly dividing that time between two kids and a husband. 

Another thing I learned is that a mother's love has no limits when it comes to her family. Although at times my heart seems like it could burst! I have been overwhelmed with emotions, both good and bittersweet. 

My daughter has been an only child for four years, and now she has to share her time with another; as do we now as parents of two. Our son is an incredible gift to our family, but we have done our best to not overlook Audriana's needs among the changes. I have to credit our extended families as well, spending extra time with Audriana and/or showering her with "big sister" gifts. She certainly hasn't felt like she's lost her spotlight; not that it's even remotely possible with that girl. 

These next years ahead of us are going to be quite the adventure. I'm anxious for the milestones of our new son, and to witness the relationship between him and Audriana. I grew up an only child, so the friendships and bonds between siblings have always fascinated me. I'm blessed to at least enjoy those moments through my own children now.   

Lastly, I have to acknowledge my inability to do any of this without my dear husband. With a few things left to finish in the nursery, the chaos approached us quickly when our son decided he wanted to get here in the middle of the night - TWO WEEKS EARLY. Yet, Chris managed to get everything together while I rested at the hospital and take care of all things I'd be unable to do once we were back home. Even with a hectic [end of the year] work week, Chris stayed around the house to make sure we were all taken care of. Whether it was fixing us breakfast, dinner, or simply waking up with me at night just to let me know he was there if I needed him... [tears commencing] ...I feel so blessed to have him as my husband. Words couldn't express just how incredible he is.

God continues to shower us with so much love, and there is no where else I'd rather be than in this moment.

Weekend Shenanis

Not a lot of documentation, but a pretty fulfilled weekend!

Family came in town on Friday and Saturday, and we did the norm; ate a LOT of food and played games. My kind of night. The only photo I seemed to gather at the time was that of our on-going game of "Hedbanz".

And if I must share, I had an extreme "Megan-moment" where I announced I was not good at geometry when discovering I was a country. Yes, that happened.

Moving on...

Sunday was also eventful. Our precious girl had a school recital and she sang in church with her classmates. This was her second for the year, and the first one didn't go so smoothly... as I mentioned here.

But not this time! She was up there singing, and did a curtsey after every applause. ;)

Not crazy shenanigans, but meaningful ones at that.

Family, friends, and food... What more can you ask for?

We are down to just 3 more weeks until our baby boy should arrive... I.CAN.NOT.WAIT.

The Non-Human Addition To Our Family

It's time to introduce you to a very special person... or animal.

Everyone, this is Sizzles.

After a collective amount of time of Sizzles attending family travels, events, school and all other occasions, I decided it was time to introduce this special guy to the world. 

As most children do, my daughter has chosen Sizzles to be the "it" thing she takes along with her everywhere. And I mean, E-V-E-R-Y-W-H-E-R-E. 

It's precious. I actually love the fact she wants to bring him places. It may seem like a hassle to some, but it's really no inconvenience. We have a real dog, but it's unlikely she could attend such events. Therefore, Sizzles stepped up to be that guy.

What makes him even more special is that my grandmother, Nannie [away in a nursing home with severe Alzheimers] had given this dog to Audriana a year before her condition became what it is. He's quite dear to our hearts in many ways.

Love & New Life

Well, we have just wrapped up quite an eventful weekend! Without going into elaborate details, here are some highlights. 

One of my favorite people in the world [also known as my aunt] threw me a beautiful baby shower on Saturday. I was able to capture a couple of my most favorite details, but they don't do it a bit of justice. Scrambling to enjoy every second, I left the photog to my sister-in-law! Thanks, Em!!! ;) 

With my family and friends gathered around, Audriana and I felt truly blessed.  

 And Sunday, I got baptized.

No words could possibly explain the emotions I endured this entire weekend. I was overwhelmed with love. Thanks to everyone for sharing this weekend with us, and especially for the support and love I received on Sunday.

Simply an amazing weekend.

Cirque du Soleil from the Ukraine

When I was three or four years old I took gymnastics, as any young child should experience for any possible coordination ability. From what I remember, it was fun. Except for the scar on the top of my foot from the cheese pit. Not so fun when there's a nail sticking out by the exit ladder. Um, ouch.

Recently, we enrolled Audriana (age 4) into the same gymnastics program and with our 5th week approaching she still seems to enjoy it. Thank goodness. I was a little concerned on the third week when the instructor assisted her up on the 4ft. balance beam and Audriana responded in tears or terror. True story. But she has overcome that, and is now a willing participant.

I never took gymnastics very seriously, given the reality that I failed at a simple backbend - if that's the accurate terminology. So, there's no real pressure for Audriana to take up such an interest. If she does, great. If she doesn't, we'll move on. Like I said, right now it's simply for coordination purposes.

Avoiding any of THESE at all costs would be a great.

 With that said, if she does so happen to take an interest in gymnastics and aspires to be the next Shawn Johnson, then we better make sure she doesn't compete against Ukrainians.

I've seen this video floating around everywhere, so I decided to see what it was all about. I believe the original title was some derivative of "jaw dropping", so I was curious.

And as all others who've witnessed this before me, my thoughts were simply "...wait, what?".

And these were my thoughts at certain points throughout the video...

1:19s: "...whoa where's this going?"

1:25s: "...does she have a vertebrate? "

2:18s: "...seriously, again??"

2:30s: "...who thinks this stuff up???"

From Three to Four

When you first glance at that positive pregnancy test, immediately you think... "really? no way." For me, nothing but excitement came into play in those first few moments, because we were actually trying. So by all means, it was more like "EEEEKKKK!!!!! FINALLY!!!!". Even announcing it, our daughter was just as surprised and happy. Although she was just shy of her 4th birthday [secrets not being her strong suit] so we didn't tell her close until the time we were ready to announce it to the rest of the world.

When we DID tell her, as expected she told everyone she ran into; whether or not it was in the right context.

Person: "Does someone have a birthday soon?"

Audriana: "... I'm going to be a big sister!"

Person: "How old are you going to be?"

Audriana: "...big sister."

That's about as accurate as her conversations were with anyone. She's very excited. And I'm thinking the age gap between the two is going to be just right. She's old enough that she gets it, and wants to be my big helper. By all means!! The reality that I'm about to have t-t-t-two kids is beginning to set in. Whoa.

Two kids. 

My first thought of two kids was initially... 

 

But then there are moments like these that leave me comforted...

She's ready to be a big sister, and I'm sure she will be will great with her baby brother. My mind still wonders how in the world some parents attain the ability [and sanity] to raise more than two! On a recent vacation outing, I witnessed multiple families of no less than 4 or 5 children. FIVE! I don't even think my brain can comprehend that reality. Not even  mentioning some of our grandparents who come from families of over 8. I praise those parents. God bless ya!!

The comparison of my first pregnancy to my second hasn't been too different. Although, this one has flown by quite quickly. I remember when I was pregnant with Audriana, each day passed about as quickly as molasses. I don't mean that in a bad way, just that I was able to savor in every month my belly changed. This time, I feel like my belly has grown over night. I'm trying to enjoy this pregnancy as much as I can, but I'm pretty sure Audriana's keeping me so busy that I'm distracted from even the subtle changes. Don't mistake that for not feeling the stretching, and constant ninja kicks going on every hour. I'm very well aware of those. I'm just finding myself at 33 weeks, wondering where the time has gone!!

I feel like I'm rambling. Am I rambling? 

I guess what I was originally trying to say is that I might not feel ready, but I know it'll be just fine when the time comes. Regardless, I'll take comfort in knowing it's normal to freak out if need be.

Mmm... chocolate.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Speaking of family, it's making me miss my husband. With these coming months being the most demanding, his absent becomes more frequent due to long hours in the office and mostly traveling. BUT he comes home today!!!! So this is to convey my serious excitement to see him!!!!!!!!!!! Xoxoxo

To my lover,

My Daughter's Taking Me To Paris

Recently when my daughter stayed with my parents, I learned that it's not only about two-ice-cream-cones-before-bed, but that traveling destinations seem to arise in conversation. Apparently, there was a discussion about going to Paris, France. Umm, I'm in! But before getting ahead of myelf here, maybe I should break it down as to how this conversation came about.

Between my four year old daughter and her Gigi (my mother):

Mom reading Audriana a book...

Mom: See that picture on the wall? 

Audriana: Mmm hmm. What is that?

Mom: That's the Eiffel Tower.

Audriana: The fiffil tower? What is the fiffil tower?

Mom: It's in Paris, France.

Dad in the background... "Who wants to go to Paris, France?!"

Audriana: I wanna go to Paris, France!

Mom: Oh, no Paris is more for grown ups not children. (Nice, mom)

Audriana's eyes fill with tears, she lays her head down and sobs. 

Mom: .....what's wrong sweetie???

Audriana (still sobbing): I want to go to Pairs, France...... (sobbing continues)

Mom: Well, maybe Pop (my dad) will take you some day!!

Audriana (sniffling): .......ok.

This is where it was decided that I was partaking in this little Euro-trip. Oh, did I not mention that I actually invited myself? Ok, well I did. So this is how that went:

Audriana: Mommy! Pop's going to take me to Paris, France!

ME: I'm sorry, what?

Audriana: Pop is taking me to Paris, France!

Looking back a dad, he smiles with that expression "yea, that's what I told her" ....

ME: Well, Audriana let me tell you something ... (sternly pointing my finger) ... you can't fly all that way by yourself, so you tell your Pop that mommy has to come with you. Understand?

Audriana: Yes ma'am.

And that folks, is how I weaseled myself into this not yet dated trip to Paris, France. Although I have to credit my daughter for coordinating it all. The tears? Well played, my dear. Well played.

ONE YEAR AGO...

I married my best friend.

He's not only that, but an amazing step-father to my daughter (our daughter). To begin the infinite list of qualities this man withholds, would leave you reading for days. He's truly an exceptional human being. Throughout the beginning of our relationship, he knew that I wasn't looking for only a friend, but a partner in life. And after life's obstacles leading up to this point, I wasn't looking for just anyone. I wasn't in this alone. Another life was also being taken into account; Audriana's. A "packaged deal" as I liked to call it. 

As we grow up, we learn the importance of one's morals and values; how crucial they are when applied to a relationship and marriage. With my own life reevaluated, I was determined to not settle for anything less than what my daughter and I deserved; loyalty, respect, and happiness. It's funny how God answers those prayers the moment you least expect it. By His grace, and mercy, He presented to me a piece of Himself in the flesh... Chris.

Not a day goes by that I don't thank him for all he does for our family. He works hard, but even at its most demanding moments he never ceases to put his family anywhere else but first. From the beginning, he stepped up to the role of a loyal husband and father figure without hesitance. And for that I am forever grateful. He's a good man, who dedicates all he can to make sure our family is well and taken care of. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world to have him as my husband. We aren't perfect, and there are days that challenge our patience - as any marriage consists of - but we have learned to work at it as a team; together.

On this very day, last year, I will never forget the butterflies I endlessly endured the entire day. Just the thought of marrying the love of my life, finally making this fairytale a reality, was simply overwhelming. But luckily with my best friends by my side, we managed to get through the morning with nothing but laughs and excitement; rarely feeling nervous.

The girls and I had stayed the night downtown, at The Brown Hotel, so it altered as our dressing room the day of the wedding. My photographer, and good friend, was there to capture every developing moment. Her and I agreed we loved the historical architecture this hotel provided, not to mention the colors of the hotel were closely parallel to those of my wedding party. Win, win! 

But of course, the materialistic aspect is only a detail of miniscule importance. Today was the day I would vow my love and devotion to Chris, and we would unite together as one. 

When it came down to the moment of seeing him, we originally wanted to keep it as traditional as possible. However, we decided we wanted to have that special moment to ourselves before presenting it to an audience. Just me and him. And so we did. One of the best photographs captured that day, was the moment I walked out to greet my future husband.   

My thoughts a that time were of everything you could think of. "There's the love of my life... the proof of God's being and love... this man is about to be mine forever... I wonder if he's as nervous as I am... I hope I don't trip... Do we kiss yet or wait until the ceremony... OMGosh, this is reality...Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry..." 

That's really about the extreme of my momentary thoughts at that time. I was overwhelmed with emotion I couldn't control. It's crazy to think that a year has already flown by so quickly. The adventures along the way were nothing as I expected. They were so much more. Shortly after the wedding we moved into a house, renovated it from top to bottom, and now here we are with a baby on the way. In between all of that, we have grown so much as a couple. The loyalty, respect and happiness I longed for, has been well over exceeded by this man. I love him, I love him, I love him. 

Chris, thank you for the years of your love. You never fail to make to me laugh when I need it, or when I least expect it! You're truly the light in my life, and my rock when I need strength. I always see God in you, when you step up to be there for Audriana in every way you can. It's an honorary role you've accustomed with an open heart, and magnitude. THANK YOU, for that. I love you so much, with every ounce of my being. 

My angel, my love... you are.

Days like these...

Well, as Murphy's Law states "if anything can go wrong, it will..." therefore in contrast I've mostly survived by, it's better to have and not need it, than need it and not have it. Except however, when things are completely out of your control ---- LIKE THE INTERNET. As soon as I began celebrating the magnificent miracle of our working network, it quits. So here we are again, weeks later... however, that's as much as I'm going to complain about it. Smile and move on! :)

Today is a momentous day!!! I'm currently at my local coffee shop; and while sipping on my usual large decaf mocha frapp, and freely enjoying their wifi, I've come to terms that this is quite a bittersweet rendezvous. The hubs is at work and my daughter is... wait for it... AT PRESCHOOL. Omgosh!! I have to pinch myself every second it crosses my mind. I cannot believe my baby girl is already in preschool.

The first day, however is a very short day and I will be picking her back up in about 20 mins!! So this is, as intended, quite a short post... just wanted to share the news that my baby is no longer a baby and I'm not sure I'm ready for that... it doesn't help that my 20 weeks hormones kick in as every 10 mins.

I couldn't ask for a better send off though. She was more than excited!!!! That definitely makes it easier on mommy... her enthusiasm is obvious. ;)

Happy First Day of Preschool, my sweet girl!! I'm so proud of you.

Happy Birthday, my sweet baby girl...

When you begin life as a new parent, everyone tells you the time will fly. You believe them to an extent, given prior events in your life (ie: highschool, college, etc). However, there is nothing comparable to the realization that your child is not a baby anymore.

#flashbackfriday, 2 mos/3 yrs old

Talk about bittersweet. My baby girl is FOUR YEARS OLD today - sometimes the thought brings tears to my eyes. You love to see them grow into their own little self, but at the same time you just wish time could stand still a little bit each year. Ok ok, leaving the sappiness behind - I could go on for days about it - I'll jump into how we celebrated this special day of my very, very, very special girl!! 

Each year we have a theme, and THIS year she picked the theme herself - again, growing up *tear. She wanted a "Princess" party. Not just the Disney princesses, but any and all were welcomed. ;) So with the theme and colors in mind, the decorating began the night before! 

One particular gift that can't be overlooked is this giant castle, from aunt Lindsay. I will say it was a huge hit with the kids, but sadly found it's spot in her room... and out of the kitchen. Ha. 

Jumping way ahead to the day of the party, the forecast was to be gloomy and rainy. However, with much prayer and positive attitude the clouds opened up and it was one of our warmest days!! Thankfully, because we needed some sunshine for this big daddy...

Might I add, it came to be of GREAT service!

 ...and just to be safe, we had a second option for the smaller tykes. :)

After much struggle, we got the kids dried off and back inside for opening gifts and cake!! I'm pretty sure the cake was more motivation for their attendance.

Sadly, among the hustle and bustle I wasn't able to capture a picture of the cake (solo) on my phone, but as you can see, it's the same design as her invitations - thanks to Sweet Stuff Bakery. We've been loyal customers since birthday #1, and they even made our wedding cake. :) 

Well as any child party goes, all guests with young children departed shortly after the cake cutting. I'm sure a much needed nap was due for most! As for the rest of the adults, they found ways to enjoy the weather as it began to cool off...

Well that's that folks... my big girl is four today. Wow, no matter how many times I say it, I just can't wrap my head around that reality. She's truly my heart and soul... the light to my world. I continue to thank the Lord for the blessing of her being, and that she continues to grow healthy and strong as each year approaches. 

God bless you, and Happy Birthday my sweet girl. 

Mommy loves you more than you'll ever know!!!!!!!

 

My Mini-Mee

Finding material to trump this past weekend's recap post seemed near impossible; until I came across photos from a recent play-date with my little one. And being that it's already Thursday, what better way to lead into the special holiday weekend - Mother's Day! :)

It's quite bittersweet when your little one is able to run to a swing set and play on their own. As parents, we just sit there, watching our child grow up before our very own eyes.

...until she hollers, "your turn Mommy!"

My turn.

Then she lets loose onto the slides... and being that we're the only ones there at the time, she's allowed to climb up or down - whichever she prefers.

...not that it's always in her favor.

She sure is the light to my world!! I once heard it best stated by Mrs. In Training, who acknowledged her little one as a companion. That's about right; she's my little companion. There's hardly anything I do without her. Mother's Day is a special day; however I'd like to think everyday is just as special because she's always by my side. My little mini-mee.

Have a blessed day everyone!!

Hello, this is Mee... and my skeletons.

I figured, for anyone interested, it was time to spill the beans a little about who I am, and all that fun stuff! I debated whether this should be a post, or an About Mee page of its own... post won. It's a bit of an overload, and when someone sees a section "About Mee" they don't necessarily want to know everyyyyyyything. Do they? It's like asking a stranger, "Hello, how are you?"...and then reciprocated by a drawn out "my day sucks, because... yata yata yata!". You then find yourself a little stunned, or speechless for that matter. Awkward.

But don't get me wrong, I'm a sucker for stories in need of comfort, as my ever-so-patient husband likes to call me "Dear Abby". I'm just saying that excessive responses are not expected at that particular moment and you may be a little overwhelmed - as you may be now with this unnecessary overture. I'm already proving my point. I seem to ramble... but, lets do this.

Now, in case you are wondering, I did not spell the word wrong... Mee was intentional. And all for good reason. Without going into an abundance of detail, my middle name is hyphenated "Danielle-Mee", and as a convenience, (or to my grandmother) I'm Megan Mee. And yes, I like to feel clever by using it as a play-on-word any chance I get. Although, I did try to avoid using it excessively on my blog. Keepin' it simple people. 

Ok, ok... moving forward. 

This is Mee:

So, lets see if I can quickly bore you to tears break it all down:

I am Korean (if that wasn't difficult to notice), but what I couldn't tell you is if I'm 100% or maybe even 3/4 Korean and 1/4 something else. Why, you ask? I was adopted at 3 months old. With that said, my parents are my parents and I do not have any idea - nor desire - of who my birth-mother was/is... was. 

As my faith being an important asset, I knew God placed me with a remarkably loving, selfless family and I could not have been more blessed and fortunate. 

"Ladies and gentleman, the Captain has turned on the Fasten Seat Belt sign. 
Make sure your seat back and folding trays are in their full upright position."

Here we go...

In my early twenties, I enrolled in Cosmetology school with my long time bestie- because we make the best decisions together... hardly - and graduated as a licensed cosmetologist... only to immediately pack my bags and move to another state given the heart sometimes overrules the mind. Figure that one out.

Jumping WAY ahead - sorry it's just best - I found myself back in my hometown, and a new single mom to a beautiful daughter.

Where to go from here? You could say my life took a turn, enduring some hardships. 

But seriously - after moving from state-to-state, divorced (oops, there I said it), and a mother at a young age - OH EM GEEEEEE - who's perfect?? 

I once heard it best stated:

"You know my name, but not who I am; 

you know what I've done, but not what I've been through."

There's been many trials and complete fails errors in my life... none that I should regret - as we learn from our mistakes - but it wasn't an easy road. Although, we aren't dealt anything we can't handle, and have to grow from them, right? At least I did.  

With Faith as my guide, I found my footing back on the right path. Which in turn led me to... what my heart would call "my angel"... my husband. A blessing, that no words could remotely describe and I'm not even going to attempt. He's simply amazing.

With this new love, and perspective that life was just beginning, I found myself focusing only on our blessings - our Faith growing stronger together - trying to always see the good; avoiding the negative. That's not easy to do when the world is what it is, but we can do what we can in our own lives!! I believe we encounter hardships as a way for us to grow - seeing another side to the world - making sure we learn and understand the difference in what's accepted and what's not. For these last years, I have lived a life along side my Faith, as guidance to what life should be about... being good to yourself. In turn, I hope to continue to be a good wife, a good mother, and a good friend. 

FUN FACTS:

- I'm a stay at home mom.

- DVR is a lifesaver when raising a toddler.

- I don't believe in food deprivation and overindulge in carbs .

- Fitness is a necessity, to make up for the above.

- My ability to recite just about every Disney movie is astonishing.

- I have a secret English accent that only my daughter is aware of.

- I'm obsessed with heels, but rarely wear them; I walk fast.

- I recently converted to country music; by miracle.

- I may or may not have a strange attraction to Jase Robertson.

- I'm obsessed with miniature items. It's true..

- I love anything to do with France.

- I need chocolate, like I need air.

There's not much more about me that's not nails to a chalkboard already been said... at least, thus far.

I started this blog as a way to write down - and share - thoughts, not so much opinions, and just everyday things that intrigue me. Although I don't credit myself as clever minded as some, or one who speaks with no filter, I'd like to think I could provide something entertaining in this bloggy world. 

If you're still with me... God bless you!! ;)